Mindfulness is balancing emotion mind and wise mind.Distress Tolerance is when you have a problem you cannot solve, but you don't want to make it worse.Emotion Regulation is having less negative emotions and vulnerability, and more positive emotional experiences.Interpersonal Effectiveness is asking for what you want and saying no effectively.

Friday, January 21, 2022

Check the Facts


Step one: what's the emotion
Step two: what the event?
Step Three: what are my thoughts?
Step four: Threat?
Step five: catastrophe?
Step six: emotion fit the facts?

Saturday, October 23, 2021


Vagal States like Water


Vagal States

What you feel in different vagal states.

Pete Walker's Types


Hybrid Types


Fight or Flight Types


We feel safe in our ventral vagal state, in which we can co-regulate with another.
The first thing that happens is responding to a novelty cue.

Then if we need to, we flee.

An alternative strategy is called Fawn.

If we can't flee, we will fight.

If we cannot flee or fight, we freeze when overwhelmed.

This can lead to a dorsal vagal collapse or shut down.

Another response is to faint, which is also a dorsal vagal response of ove-rinhibition.

Antidotes to some of these states are:

Saturday, December 19, 2020

Building up self-nurturing compassion

 Tara Brach's process called RAIN

"The acronym RAIN is an easy-to-remember tool for practicing mindfulness and compassion using the following four steps:

Recognize what is happening;
Allow the experience to be there, just as it is;
Investigate with interest and care;
Nurture with self-compassion.

You can take your time and explore RAIN as a stand-alone meditation or move through the steps whenever challenging feelings arise.

• Visit RAIN: A Practice of Radical Compassion for a full description of the steps of RAIN. Download a new free printable guide here: RAIN: A Practice of Radical Compassion (PDF).
• The RAIN of Self-Compassion includes the steps of RAIN, as well as some translations to other languages.
• Radical Compassion, Tara’s guidebook to RAIN, addresses in depth the many applications of RAIN, and how to work with an array of challenges that arise.
• Download your free Radical Compassion Study Guide.

Note: The Two Versions of the Acronym RAIN:

There have been two primary forms of the RAIN acronym circulating in the meditation spheres, and we would like to clarify between the original and more recently evolved versions. (read more)"